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31 December 2037 @ 01:48 am
Sometimes I think I am unabashedly vain because I was led to believe the universe revolved around me. My parents, who were very particular and obsessive about how they wanted their family to be, were about two kids short in their procreation. As such, I became an only child. We are by no means rich, but I live in a world sheltered enough that my family had the power to wall me inside my own house, and raise me on an endless supply of Nancy Drew Mysteries. Growing up, I had the vague feeling even my cousins were scared of befriending me. This phenomenon has receded in recent years, as the birth of my nieces and nephews has necessitated my call-to-duty as ever-eager Godmother.

I profess to having no sense of humor. I try to compensate through self-deprecation, and a propensity to come up with statements I regret ten minutes or so after I have said them.Collapse )
Current Location: Quezon City
Current Mood: blankblank
Current Music: electric fan spinning
19 May 2030 @ 08:27 pm
My buddies made a fanfic community called ficxperiments
Henceforth, all the crazy fanfiction I come up with will be posted there.
Please support us. Yoroshiku onegaishimasu!

"No amount of passion can overcome a lack of technical expertise... (but) producing things solely for self-gratification is not necessarily bad." ~Irisu Fuyumi, HyoukaCollapse )
Current Location: Quezon City
Current Mood: blankblank
Current Music: MYMP (Cover) - Power of Two
26 December 2015 @ 09:55 pm
Yes, I'm still alive. So much, and at the same time, not much at all has been happening to me. I promise I have been writing though. Just not here.

I mentioned some time ago that I joined this writing contest at some other site - which I will now conceal under the name Hogwarts Extreme - and the thing is I've gotten hooked. I've been writing so much for that site - and so seriously, too - that I can't even take a proper brain breather to write so much as an entry for my personal blog - no, not this one, because this is the Fandom Blog. I can't even promise to write new stuff for Arashi soon. I do, however, guarantee that I have all het fic requests from this journal on my to-do lists.

So like I said, I have been doing nothing and everything. For example, a huge chunk of my time has been spent pinning all sorts of crazy things on Pinterest. I've discovered that I have a thing for pretty doors. That's why I have an absurd amount of door pictures now. I will show you one - I picked this one because it has cats.

And then-Collapse )

It's August. I know I said I'd be writing drabbles for everyone in June, but - as luck would have it - I was so inspired to write these past few months that I applied for a writing contest on another site, and - miracle of miracles - got in. Although I wasn't expecting anything to come out of my random application, this contest actually turned out to be competitive. So, er, they have a strict deadline for that contest, and I've been working as hard on it as I could. Meaning, of course, that other priorities have to take a backseat. (And since the contest follows an elimination system, I might get kicked out of the running early. Who knows?)

For all those who requested drabbles, please don't worry. I'll be working on them as soon as I get my 'stuff' in order. I'm so sorry for the delay.

On my end, there really hasn't been much to talk about. I'm on an extremely long vacation. Some would call me unemployed, but strictly speaking, the economic term unemployed refers to persons who haven't been hired even though they've been looking for jobs. All things considered then, I'm not unemployed, because I'm not looking for a job. I'm just bumming around.

All the free time doesn't naturally equate to productivity though, so yeah. Back to the I-hope-everyone-you-don't-mind-waiting-for-the-drabbles-I-promised statement. I swear I'm doing what I can.

Cheers to all!

Photo (c) Ed Gregory on Stokpic.
01 June 2015 @ 01:49 am
Hello, everyone~
I haven't been writing recently,
but the good news is that I did manage to finish my senior thesis.
YEY! I'm 'this' close to graduating.

Because I'm in the middle of trying to be employed,
I figured I'd like to start writing again in the meantime,
except that my brain's a bit dried up from all that academic writing.
If you have anything you'd like to be written down -
I can't guarantee it will be any good, but I'll do my best -
please PM me.

I can only promise the following:Collapse )
I hope you can help me with my project to re-inject creativity into my life.
I'll keep this project going for the whole month of June.
Please let me know if you'd like me to write something for you!
You'll be helping me very much.

Thank you!


PS I thought it might be better to make this the masterpost, too.

June Het Drabbles
For raene_9 : Recital ft. Matsumoto Jun.
Current Location: Quezon City, Philippines
Current Mood: blankblank
Current Music: Walk the Moon - Shut Up and Dance
23 February 2015 @ 04:01 pm
The function of LJ for me as of late has been as a sort of leeching-ground for all downloads Arashi-related. Maybe this sentiment has to do with how quiet LJ seems recently - I realize people are on Tumblr and elsewhere now, but really, has good old writing been devalued to a form of expression better relegated to the past? But I am ranting. I am ranting, and I told myself I would not rant, because - I said - I would go back to writing in my LJ blog as a sort of therapy. If that makes sense.

I was reading through my old posts and I realized that if there is a common theme to the stuff I've been posting here on this blog, it's sadness. I am at my most honest, most genuine in this website. Something about the idea that almost none of the people I interact with on a daily basis know this blog exists comforts me. I can be who I really am on this site, and maybe this is why I am so sad here. Because I feel that, no matter how long-winded or bitchy I will sound, no one can judge me to my face. So maybe I'm being a coward by lurking in the hidden depths of LJ, but hey - therapy.


Here, have a happy lunar new year cat.Collapse )
Current Location: Quezon City, Philippines
Current Mood: blankblank
Current Music: Natsukawa Rimi - Nada Sou Sou
20 January 2015 @ 02:00 pm
After a very long time, I've published something again. The masterpost of sorts may be found here: http://arashirabu.livejournal.com/5118627.html The stories are, of course, published in ficxperiments.livejournal.com. Please continue to support us~

Frankly, I haven't stopped writing - although I know I haven't published anything in ages. The latest of the stories that are part of the ficdump was written in July of last year - it was ready for publishing then, but somehow I just let it rot in my folders. I don't know where I first got the idea of writing about the members' exes - although I do love exploring the history between people's exes, because I think that more often than we think, a couple breaks up not because one of them has been horrible, but just because the circumstances weren't right. I do remember that I wrote the story for Sho, Sad Movies, first. After that, I realized I liked the idea of using songs as springboards for fics, and since shorts are relatively easier to do, I thought I'd write a story for each of them.

My favorite among the five is the one I wrote for Ohno, Mister Sandman. I like it not just because of the gap in Ohno's character, but also because it's a quiet story - I don't manage to come up with those very often, so I feel very happy each time I do. Personally, I think the story that came out best in terms of technicals is the one for Nino, Broken Vow, because it's very angsty and comical, and writing stuff like that means you just let your brain fart take over the keyboard. I think the story for Aiba, Mrs Robinson, is difficult to understand if you've never heard of the original Simon and Garfunkel song, or if you don't have an inkling of what the movie The Graduate is about. The story for Jun, Almost Lover, is remarkably uninspired, but at least it's got the best title among the five to make up for that lack.

Like I've said, I haven't stopped writing. I also have two completed horror one-shots that are rotting in my folders because I don't feel up to posting them yet. I'm halfway done with a complicated horror, psycho thriller called Ripples, and so far it's very bad. The worst part is that I don't think I can save it. I just want it done though.

I wanted to publish a 20-chapter story for Sho's birthday this year, but I've sadly not crossed the first half of the thing yet. I've been working on its writing since March of last year, and the plot has been fermenting itself in my head - in various versions - since 2011. I'm not sure if it will ever see the light of day, as it's too think-y for a romcom, but if it does, I'll be sure to post it at ficxperiments.

Meanwhile, I am still thinking of which flavor of cake to buy for Sho's birthday party on Saturday. Suggestions much appreciated.
Current Location: Quezon City, Philippines
Current Mood: blankblank
Current Music: TOKIO - Love You Only
15 September 2014 @ 04:11 pm
I take a break from my normal life to ponder on what Arashi is for me.

Really though, to me, that is what Arashi is. It is the break from my normal, boring, but slightly stressful and infuriating life. It's like the vitamin that I am addicted to, my happy pills - the tumblr stash that makes me smile instantly even during my worst moments. A friend who was once stuck in loneliness asked me if I had something that, when ingested, when seen, made the world a better place instantly in a single snap. And I did. I do. That is Arashi.

I can never be more thankful that I have found Arashi, and it has saved me.

As a fan I've heard of a lot of stories of people who claim that Arashi have saved them from suicide, from depression. I have also heard of people - even fellow Arashi fans - who have been skeptical of these claims, saying that a boy band cannot save you, only you can save yourself. To a certain extent, I agree. There is nobody who can save you but yourself. But the strength that you need in order to become your own rescuer, where do you get that? I get it from Arashi, as many others have. It is not something most will understand, probably having different experiences and circumstances. But to us, to me, Arashi is the force that urges me on. At a certain time in my life Arashi was the only reason I woke up in the morning and struggled to make it through the rest of the day.

I'm past that now. The worst is over. And because the worst is over, I will probably not be as reliant on Arashi as I used to be. In the past, I would check on their updates by the hour, by the day. Now, it would be a rarity to have me checking on them once a week.

I have not stopped being a fan. I will never stop being a fan. It is not something you can push out of your system even at will. It would be like dissecting your thoughts and memories into boxes, and trashing anything that has had to do with being a fan once. But when you're a fan, it seeps into your entire being such that everything you do is enveloped in it. The constant struggle for Ohno's calm. The search for a drive to match Sakurai's. The cultivation of a way of viewing the world the way Ninomiya and Aiba do - a stark and bleak reality matched with bursting optimism. The desire to be able to treat others carefully, the way Matsumoto would. As though every person was priceless, as every person is.

On this day, I try to explain why I am an Arashi fan and why I always will be. I fail, least of all because I find it difficult to express myself. I fail because Arashi is not for one to theorize. It is for one to experience.

On this day, Arashi, thank you for everything.
Current Location: Quezon City, Philippines
Current Mood: blankblank
Current Music: Theme from Ohoku
01 September 2014 @ 01:10 am
Christmas in the Philippines is the longest in the world. We start celebrating upon the arrival of the -ber months, so when it hit midnight earlier and September 1st came rolling in, my roommate and I played Jingle Bell Rock on YouTube. To me, this signals the beginning of the end of the year. I'm not sure how I feel about this.

I'm still alive. I have been writing as much as I can. But I haven't been posting for several reasons. Either way, all the stuff I come up with will probably be in the journal ficxperiments I've got at least seven stories pending for posting. Anytime soon when I feel like it. HO HO.

I'm not making much sense, am I? Here, have a cat picture:


What have I been doing since I last wrote about myself?Collapse )
Current Location: Quezon City, Philippines
Current Mood: blankblank
Current Music: Lorde - Team
24 June 2014 @ 11:43 pm
When South Korean college student Ji-Ho (Hyomin) loses her boyfriend in a traffic accident, she goes on an exchange program to neighboring Japan to ease the pain of losing him. In her new dormitory she meets the antisocial Kaede (Shimizu Kurumi) whose friendship she instantly pursues. Upon discovering that her new friend’s first love also attends their university, Ji-Ho decides to play matchmaker. She introduces the South Korean dating method mildang (love tug-of-war) to ensure that Kaede gets confessed to by the guy she likes. But the other half of the unlikely couple, Yusuke (Yamazaki Kento), is timid and not fond of romance at all, and even though he has feelings for Kaede he finds it difficult to express them. Determined to see the two together, Ji-Ho takes matters into her own hands.


During the first few scenes of this movie I was seriously doubtful about how the succeeding 120 minutes would play out given its lead actress was obviously not an actress. Something about her hinted at her being not completely at ease with a camera, from the way she seemed too conscious that she was being filmed, to the way she forced herself to be cute. It all worked out in the end though, especially when Hyomin had to interact with the other two leads, Shimizu and Yamazaki, whose acting skills were more rooted and secure. Truthfully, it was Ji-Ho’s romance that made me cry, but Hyomin’s portrayal could have been better.

As an individual I tend to relate more easily with characters like Kaede, so I understand why she feels like dating the mildang way involves lies and deception. Trying to be cute and attentive does seem at first like a burdensome mask that has no place in intimate relationships, but I also recognize what Ji-Ho teaches her. The movie in fact does well in providing a background story for Ji-Ho, a history that gives justice to the heroine of this entire adventure. Hyomin is especially lovely in the last few minutes of this film – I was sobbing my heart out by that time, so I may not be judging her performance objectively.


Jinx!!! is a romance movie that is obviously aware of its genre and the public expectations of it. Surprisingly, although it incorporates a lot of studied cheese like theories on love as explored in the grand arena of Hollywood romance classics – it breaks the fourth wall and pokes fun at itself in very classy ways – it is also very restrained in a distinctly Japanese way. Kaede and Yusuke are painfully shy and dense – so thick I’m sure some viewers gave up on their relationship halfway. And although Yusuke tries very hard to create the right atmosphere of romance for Kaede, he fails miserably. The film captures this failure spectacularly. But even with this standard Japanese romcom awkwardness hanging in the air, its sharp contrast with Ji-Ho’s memories unraveled with the painful tenderness reminiscent of Korean melodrama makes the movie a must-watch. I am definitely recommending this to my friends.


Slow but enduring, Jinx is perfect for young people who are still hopeful about their futures in love. Project Manuela gives Jinx!!! 4 out 5 rainbow stripes. It is aesthetically pleasing, moving, easy to understand, and intelligent. From my perspective it fails only because it moves extremely slowly in its first half, as Japanese movies are wont to do. But it is definitely deserving of a place in the hearts of high schoolers everywhere, who want to believe in the love they have yet to experience.

Thanks to Plotboxes @ LJ for recommending the film by translating it. Crossposted at projectmanuela @ Wordpress.
Current Location: Quezon City, Philippines
Current Mood: blankblank
Current Music: A Chorus Line - What I Did For Love